Overthinking everything? Understanding why our minds get stuck

It’s 11pm. You’re lying in bed, the lights are off, and you’re ready to drift off to sleep.

And yet, your brain is wide awake.

Your mind decides this is the perfect time to replay that awkward encounter you had yesterday. Or maybe it jumps ahead to tomorrow’s meeting, running through everything that could go wrong.

Sound familiar?

You’re not alone. This is overthinking, and it shows up in two main ways: worry and rumination.

What are worry and rumination?

Worry is future-focused.
It’s all the “what ifs” about things that haven’t even happened yet.

Rumination is past-focused.
It’s the “why did I…” or “I should have…” thoughts that keep the past on repeat.

And the hard part? They often feed into each other.
You replay the past, then start fearing the future.

Are your thoughts the problem?

Simply put, no.

It’s not the negative thought itself that keeps you stuck in a loop. It’s how you respond to the thought.

Most of us fall into what’s known as the “push-pull” trap.

You pull the thought closer, giving it too much time, energy, and attention. This keeps you stuck in a spiral of worry or rumination.

You push the thought away, trying to suppress or ignore the thought. But here’s the catch… have you ever tried not thinking about a pink elephant?

Exactly.

The more you push the thought away, the stronger it comes back. That’s called the rebound effect.

What keeps overthinking going?

There are three reasons why you keep overthinking.

1.    Your beliefs about thinking

Some of these beliefs make overthinking feel helpful. Others make it feel dangerous and uncontrollable.

2.    Your attention gets stuck

Your mind focuses too much on the negative thought and you struggle to disengage from it.

3.    Your behaviours that seem helpful, but aren’t

You may try to “fix” the thought by:

• Overplanning
• Overanalysing
• Avoiding situations

Ironically, these “solutions” tend to make overthinking worse, not better.

An evidence-based approach to managing overthinking

One of the easiest ways to reduce worry and rumination is postponement. 

Instead of getting caught up in overthinking, you delay it, telling yourself, “I’ll think about this later.” This small shift puts you back in control. 

The method is simple: notice it, name it, and delay it. 

When done properly, it sounds like this: “I’m noticing I’m worried about messing up my presentation, this is a worry, I’ll come back to it at 7pm.”

The key is that postponement must not turn into avoidance. Setting a specific worry and rumination time means you’re not avoiding the thought, you’re choosing when to deal with it.

With practice, this will help you escape your negative thought loops and feel more in control of your mind.

Written by Beth Shaw, Group Coordinator at Lawson Clinical Psychology

More information

If you’re struggling with overthinking, you’re not alone. Support is available through our Overcome Overthinking and Worry workshops. Learn practical, evidence-based strategies to break negative thought loops. 

For more information on the psychological therapies we offer or to join the workshop, please email our team at reception@lawsonpsychology.com.au or phone us on 08 6143 4499.

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